Comments on: Are Barbados’ child support and paternity laws skewed against men? http://www.antillean.org/2009/04/13/are-barbados-child-support-and-paternity-laws-skewed-against-men/ Socially responsible news and commentary from the Caribbean region and the wider Americas Sun, 29 Jan 2012 12:22:10 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=abc By: Alicia, St. Michael http://www.antillean.org/2009/04/13/are-barbados-child-support-and-paternity-laws-skewed-against-men/comment-page-1/#comment-3517 Alicia, St. Michael Mon, 03 Oct 2011 22:18:19 +0000 http://blog.bajandream.org/2009/04/13/are-barbados-child-support-and-paternity-laws-skewed-against-men/#comment-3517 I am a mother of 3, 2 of whom are from a 'dead beat' dad who although in court offers no financial support. If he pays support voluntarily once per year its a lot. The only time I receive support is if a warrant is issued and that's if I am lucky enough to hound d court to issue a summons n they only summon for 3 months although he is over a year in arrears. I agree there are dif individual cases and each should be looked at pertaining to its own circumstances but I'd like to know how I can get the court that's in place to assist me as a mother to collect maintenance for my kids when although the man lives 5 feet from the court has all his contact info in place can never be found. This man who after we broke up told me to find a man to support me and 'MY' kids (no question to paternity here as they're his) a man who works 2 jobs and owns his own business but can't pay 520 a month support for 2 kids, a man who told his own daughter that his house coms 1st, who cudnt pay support but came up with a deposit for a mortgage. How do I get payment from him through the courts that art suppose to assist me? I am a mother of 3, 2 of whom are from a ‘dead beat’ dad who although in court offers no financial support. If he pays support voluntarily once per year its a lot. The only time I receive support is if a warrant is issued and that’s if I am lucky enough to hound d court to issue a summons n they only summon for 3 months although he is over a year in arrears. I agree there are dif individual cases and each should be looked at pertaining to its own circumstances but I’d like to know how I can get the court that’s in place to assist me as a mother to collect maintenance for my kids when although the man lives 5 feet from the court has all his contact info in place can never be found. This man who after we broke up told me to find a man to support me and ‘MY’ kids (no question to paternity here as they’re his) a man who works 2 jobs and owns his own business but can’t pay 520 a month support for 2 kids, a man who told his own daughter that his house coms 1st, who cudnt pay support but came up with a deposit for a mortgage. How do I get payment from him through the courts that art suppose to assist me?

]]> By: <img src="http://www.antillean.org/wp-content/plugins/geosmart/flags/ca.png" alt="Canada" /> Kamini Edwards <small id="gs_author_location">from Ontario, Canada</small> http://www.antillean.org/2009/04/13/are-barbados-child-support-and-paternity-laws-skewed-against-men/comment-page-1/#comment-3448 Canada Kamini Edwards from Ontario, Canada Thu, 11 Nov 2010 21:41:55 +0000 http://blog.bajandream.org/2009/04/13/are-barbados-child-support-and-paternity-laws-skewed-against-men/#comment-3448 I am very concern about the problems our (Men) are having, causing and suffering themselves and others. Please' let us help them NOW- Men are more vulnerable than women no matter how macho they look or feels,meaning that they look,and behave one way and when under presure' it is something else! How do we help? I have a suggestion and would like to share it. I believe that if we deal with this problem early o'clock we will get better results. (1) Rumdrinking (2) Gambling (3) womanizing- of them all Rumdrinking is killing them and gambling is destroying themselves and the family relationships - womanising can be justified and deal with in a simple way,and that is by laying your cards down with all your trump cards . Meaning if there are 'things to share , or who has to go , or who wants to abide with foolishness and continue to suffer. I have been abused in my marriage by my rumdrinking husband- I tried to help him by seeking help for him,but the problem is there is not much help for these guys.. They need strong Men with a( real Man knowledge) a man who is not afraid to tell men where to get off and how to treat Women' I know there are Naughty Men and Women ,but it is visa versa .There are Men and Women who needs Real Help and NOW. What is MESA doing .. I am willing to help with my expertise. I am very concern about the problems our (Men) are having, causing and suffering themselves and others. Please’ let us help them NOW- Men are more vulnerable than women no matter how macho they look or feels,meaning that they look,and behave one way and when under presure’ it is something else! How do we help? I have a suggestion and would like to share it. I believe that if we deal with this problem early o’clock we will get better results.
(1) Rumdrinking
(2) Gambling
(3) womanizing- of them all Rumdrinking is killing them and gambling is destroying themselves and the family relationships – womanising can be justified and deal with in a simple way,and that is by laying your cards down with all your trump cards . Meaning if there are ‘things to share , or who has to go , or who wants to abide with foolishness and continue to suffer.

I have been abused in my marriage by my rumdrinking husband- I tried to help him by seeking help for him,but the problem is there is not much help for these guys.. They need strong Men with a( real Man knowledge) a man who is not afraid to tell men where to get off and how to treat Women’
I know there are Naughty Men and Women ,but it is visa versa .There are Men and Women who needs Real Help and NOW. What is MESA doing .. I am willing to help with my expertise.

]]> By: <img src="http://www.antillean.org/wp-content/plugins/geosmart/flags/bb.png" alt="Barbados" /> Nicko <small id="gs_author_location">from Saint Michael, Barbados</small> http://www.antillean.org/2009/04/13/are-barbados-child-support-and-paternity-laws-skewed-against-men/comment-page-1/#comment-3422 Barbados Nicko from Saint Michael, Barbados Wed, 11 Aug 2010 18:30:14 +0000 http://blog.bajandream.org/2009/04/13/are-barbados-child-support-and-paternity-laws-skewed-against-men/#comment-3422 Women and their rights are to be respected so waite what are men nothing, it shows me how much women think of a man and his feelings and views when the first thing out their mouths are dead beat dads,they never stop or think what could have caused this man to be like this. Let me tell you women out there some thing,some of you expect to treat a man as you wish and still want him to come around to see his child,when most of the time its so uncomfortable with you trying to make him look like a villan,but yet he is do dig in to his pockets to help you out,all kids need support and care but women dont care who they hurt,i had my daughter from 6 months old untill 3years old,her mother never helped me with nothing but if she comes for her to spend the weekend she would still ask for money for the 2days,so what do you women work for ice,or just to buy 40pairs of shoes and bags but if we do it we are dead beat oooo please.study it. Women and their rights are to be respected so waite what are men nothing, it shows me how much women think of a man and his feelings and views when the first thing out their mouths are dead beat dads,they never stop or think what could have caused this man to be like this.
Let me tell you women out there some thing,some of you expect to treat a man as you wish and still want him to come around to see his child,when most of the time its so uncomfortable with you trying to make him look like a villan,but yet he is do dig in to his pockets to help you out,all kids need support and care but women dont care who they hurt,i had my daughter from 6 months old untill 3years old,her mother never helped me with nothing but if she comes for her to spend the weekend she would still ask for money for the 2days,so what do you women work for ice,or just to buy 40pairs of shoes and bags but if we do it we are dead beat oooo please.study it.

]]> By: <img src="http://www.antillean.org/wp-content/plugins/geosmart/flags/bb.png" alt="Barbados" /> jamie <small id="gs_author_location">from Saint Peter, Barbados</small> http://www.antillean.org/2009/04/13/are-barbados-child-support-and-paternity-laws-skewed-against-men/comment-page-1/#comment-3416 Barbados jamie from Saint Peter, Barbados Wed, 30 Jun 2010 22:51:23 +0000 http://blog.bajandream.org/2009/04/13/are-barbados-child-support-and-paternity-laws-skewed-against-men/#comment-3416 If the man he got money in:BIM " he can buy off the courts indefintely If the man he got money in:BIM ” he can buy off the courts indefintely

]]> By: <img src="http://www.antillean.org/wp-content/plugins/geosmart/flags/bb.png" alt="Barbados" /> jamie <small id="gs_author_location">from Saint Peter, Barbados</small> http://www.antillean.org/2009/04/13/are-barbados-child-support-and-paternity-laws-skewed-against-men/comment-page-1/#comment-3415 Barbados jamie from Saint Peter, Barbados Wed, 30 Jun 2010 22:49:17 +0000 http://blog.bajandream.org/2009/04/13/are-barbados-child-support-and-paternity-laws-skewed-against-men/#comment-3415 There are women who suffer in Barbados courts it depends how many people you know how much ,money you have and how many lodge buddies you have.. There are women who suffer in Barbados courts it depends how many people you know how much ,money you have and how many lodge buddies you have..

]]> By: <img src="http://www.antillean.org/wp-content/plugins/geosmart/flags/us.png" alt="United States" /> Honesty <small id="gs_author_location">from Florida, United States</small> http://www.antillean.org/2009/04/13/are-barbados-child-support-and-paternity-laws-skewed-against-men/comment-page-1/#comment-3411 United States Honesty from Florida, United States Sat, 05 Jun 2010 18:07:03 +0000 http://blog.bajandream.org/2009/04/13/are-barbados-child-support-and-paternity-laws-skewed-against-men/#comment-3411 Paternity testing should be done at birth. Children deserve to know who their biological father is as soon as posible. Children have committed suicide after finding out many years later in a divorce trial that they do not know who their father is. This is a simple and cheap test. Couples used to provide blood tests before marriage, this is really not a big issue to get started. Save a child's life! Paternity testing should be done at birth. Children deserve to know who their biological father is as soon as posible. Children have committed suicide after finding out many years later in a divorce trial that they do not know who their father is. This is a simple and cheap test. Couples used to provide blood tests before marriage, this is really not a big issue to get started. Save a child’s life!

]]> By: <img src="http://www.antillean.org/wp-content/plugins/geosmart/flags/bb.png" alt="Barbados" /> Bajan Father <small id="gs_author_location">from Saint Michael, Barbados</small> http://www.antillean.org/2009/04/13/are-barbados-child-support-and-paternity-laws-skewed-against-men/comment-page-1/#comment-3295 Barbados Bajan Father from Saint Michael, Barbados Wed, 10 Mar 2010 13:09:21 +0000 http://blog.bajandream.org/2009/04/13/are-barbados-child-support-and-paternity-laws-skewed-against-men/#comment-3295 There is an inherent bias against men in the laws relating to paternity and children. And yes, there are men who ignore their children and who should be made to face consequences, however there are also cases of women with 4 children from 6 men. In fact this scenario is quite common. A magistrate should judge the case before him or her on its merits, to make a blanket generalisation about paternity tests is highly inappropriate. What is wrong with a man wanting to be sure that he is about to take on a lifetime committment that is actually his? From the reaction of some to this article it would seem that women NEVER have sex with more than one man in a menstrual cycle. Further, in the cases where heaven forbid a father should actually want custody of the child, God help him! If the mother wants them there is no way in heaven or earth that the father will get them, short of the mother being a drug dealing serial killer (and sometimes not even then) Is the law always perfect? No there are several cases where it is blatantly biassed against women (have a look at how citizenship applies if a Bajan woman marries a foreigner, as opposed to a Bajan man marrying a foreigner) However women have a very organised lobby for women's rights and women's issues. (as they well should) MESA is perhaps not perfect, however it is in the Barbadian case the first organised voice to attempt to address gender issues that relate to men. It is ironic that the most hostile response to their comments are from those who most demand an ear for their own issues. There is an inherent bias against men in the laws relating to paternity and children. And yes, there are men who ignore their children and who should be made to face consequences, however there are also cases of women with 4 children from 6 men. In fact this scenario is quite common.

A magistrate should judge the case before him or her on its merits, to make a blanket generalisation about paternity tests is highly inappropriate. What is wrong with a man wanting to be sure that he is about to take on a lifetime committment that is actually his? From the reaction of some to this article it would seem that women NEVER have sex with more than one man in a menstrual cycle.

Further, in the cases where heaven forbid a father should actually want custody of the child, God help him! If the mother wants them there is no way in heaven or earth that the father will get them, short of the mother being a drug dealing serial killer (and sometimes not even then)

Is the law always perfect? No there are several cases where it is blatantly biassed against women (have a look at how citizenship applies if a Bajan woman marries a foreigner, as opposed to a Bajan man marrying a foreigner) However women have a very organised lobby for women’s rights and women’s issues. (as they well should) MESA is perhaps not perfect, however it is in the Barbadian case the first organised voice to attempt to address gender issues that relate to men. It is ironic that the most hostile response to their comments are from those who most demand an ear for their own issues.

]]> By: <img src="http://www.antillean.org/wp-content/plugins/geosmart/flags/bb.png" alt="Barbados" /> Heaven <small id="gs_author_location">from Saint Michael, Barbados</small> http://www.antillean.org/2009/04/13/are-barbados-child-support-and-paternity-laws-skewed-against-men/comment-page-1/#comment-3294 Barbados Heaven from Saint Michael, Barbados Tue, 09 Mar 2010 15:13:18 +0000 http://blog.bajandream.org/2009/04/13/are-barbados-child-support-and-paternity-laws-skewed-against-men/#comment-3294 Darlene...last time I checked he was in Cayman Islands but i am not sure if he is still there. Darlene…last time I checked he was in Cayman Islands but i am not sure if he is still there.

]]> By: <img src="http://www.antillean.org/wp-content/plugins/geosmart/flags/us.png" alt="United States" /> Darlene Arthur <small id="gs_author_location">from Florida, United States</small> http://www.antillean.org/2009/04/13/are-barbados-child-support-and-paternity-laws-skewed-against-men/comment-page-1/#comment-3283 United States Darlene Arthur from Florida, United States Sun, 21 Feb 2010 01:27:37 +0000 http://blog.bajandream.org/2009/04/13/are-barbados-child-support-and-paternity-laws-skewed-against-men/#comment-3283 HEAVEN: When I married my ex he was living in Bermuda, I believe his son was a teenager and his daughter I believe five years old. He ignored his kids the day he left Barbados to come to Bermuda to be with a woman.....I learned of these kids after the fact, did I agree with him being a deadbeat father of cause not I am a mother and was a mother before I married him...So yes my daughter is suffering as I am sure his other kids did, however one day he will be accountable for his actions I hope and pray I am still around.... I am presently trying to find him and when I do I will make sure he takes care of his responsibilities...however he keeps evading the authorities..... HEAVEN: When I married my ex he was living in Bermuda, I believe his son was a teenager and his daughter I believe five years old. He ignored his kids the day he left Barbados to come to Bermuda to be with a woman…..I learned of these kids after the fact, did I agree with him being a deadbeat father of cause not I am a mother and was a mother before I married him…So yes my daughter is suffering as I am sure his other kids did, however one day he will be accountable for his actions I hope and pray I am still around…. I am presently trying to find him and when I do I will make sure he takes care of his responsibilities…however he keeps evading the authorities…..

]]> By: <img src="http://www.antillean.org/wp-content/plugins/geosmart/flags/bb.png" alt="Barbados" /> Heaven <small id="gs_author_location">from Saint Michael, Barbados</small> http://www.antillean.org/2009/04/13/are-barbados-child-support-and-paternity-laws-skewed-against-men/comment-page-1/#comment-3269 Barbados Heaven from Saint Michael, Barbados Thu, 21 Jan 2010 04:36:54 +0000 http://blog.bajandream.org/2009/04/13/are-barbados-child-support-and-paternity-laws-skewed-against-men/#comment-3269 Darlene I know your ex husband and I will say while there are two sides to every story your ex husband is an idiot. While he was married to you he ignored the children that he left back in Barbados, so your daughter is now being treated the same way.. Darlene I know your ex husband and I will say while there are two sides to every story your ex husband is an idiot. While he was married to you he ignored the children that he left back in Barbados, so your daughter is now being treated the same way..

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